Actress Neha Dhupia’s comments on the show Roadies Revolution recently created a huge controversy. This is how the controversy started- A contestant on the show said that a girl cheated him with five boyfriends. Then he lined up all five of them along with her and slapped her as a revenge for her betrayal.
To this, Neha Dhupia raged on the contestant and said that whatever the girl did was her choice. That perhaps he may have not been the best guy for her. And that it was not his right to slap a girl.
This was the start of a controversy that escalated so badly that even the actress’s family members were harassed by trolls on the Internet.
So is Neha Dhupia really a “Fake Feminist” as labeled by the Internet Trolls? Is she a Hypocrite? Or is there something people and trolls have failed to see and understand her statement.
The real meaning behind what Neha Dhupia said
Neha Dhupia said that it has the girl’s choice to be in a relationship with five men and he should not have hit her for that.
See, let me make one thing clear. The actress never justified the girl’s actions. What she was trying to do was to make a distinction between the girl’s actions and what the contestant did to take revenge for it, or perhaps to make her realize the consequences of her actions.
Although she definitely made a wrong choice of words, that doesn’t take away the fact that all she was trying to do was to make a distinction.
Being in multiple relationships is a girl’s choice. But Betrayal is not!
If taken literally, Neha Dhupia was absolutely correct to say that it’s a girl’s choice to be in multiple relationships. Relationships result from emotions, which despite what we do about it, are simply beyond the control of anyone other than the one experiencing them.
If a girl feels emotionally satiated with more than one man, then she can live that way. But such relationships should never be made out of fake promises to someone. This was the girl’s mistake and a huge one at that.
If a girl makes a guy feel that he’s the only one in her life, and most importantly promises him the same in a direct manner- then she’s obligated to not commit to anybody else.
It’s true, there are types of relationships without promises and boundations. But truly emotional bonds can only be made out of commitments and a few obligations. Relationships without conditions are relationships without love.
Surely this was a conventional, conditional relationship between both the guy and girl involved in this case. This is why the girl was obligated to be with him and only him, and doing otherwise was to be termed as Cheating.
But is slapping a woman an apt punishment for cheating? I can understand, being cheated is a grave mental wound that is hard to heal. But physical abuse isn’t the right way to deal with it. It is in fact, one of the worst ways to deal with any problem that involves a woman!
Hitting a Woman is one of the worst Moral crimes
As I mentioned earlier, Neha Dhupia had to say that nobody has a right to slap a girl. She had to make this distinction because a man hitting a woman is completely different than a man hitting another man.
A woman does not have the psychological instincts of men to fight a physical battle. Over the years of progress in human civilization, women have rarely indulged in physical battles, as men have always been the better ones to do.
It’s a shame that I have to explain something so obvious as this. But hitting a woman who isn’t equal to a man in terms of strength is equivalent to crippling someone who can barely even walk.
Men have the psychological instinct to prove their superiority through a physical battle. It’s encoded in their DNA. But a woman’s psychological instinct is to protect, is to care for who they love and what they want to prepare.
Most, if not all women aren’t prepared, nor deserving to take slaps or a beating from men, in any situation. It is this distinction that Neha was trying to make. Hitting a woman is not a way to exact revenge or to make her reap the consequences of her actions.
It is with the understanding of these evolutionary traits of men and women that children are taught to never place their hands on a woman. It is in an understanding of this distinction that Neha Dhupia lashed out the Roadies Revolution contestant for saying that he hit her with a slap.
Proof that Neha Dhupia isn’t a Fake Feminist
Have a look at this Instagram video posted by an Ex-Roadies contestant, Thakur Kashish Pundir.
View this post on Instagram
This video is of an old season of Roadies where Neha dealt with a woman who apparently slapped a male contestant. Here, she isn’t taking the side of a woman. In the fashion of a true feminist, she tells her why it is so shameful of her to hit a man because she knows he wouldn’t hit her. She even goes further ahead to tell the female contestant how he could have badly harmed her if he took her as an equal.
Neha is showing the woman her place for shamelessly taking advantage of being a woman. So how does this make the actress a “fake feminist”? All along, she had been only doing what she felt was right.
Betrayal in romantic relationships is a moral crime and an emotional pain. But it wouldn’t heal out of physical punishment. Pure relationships are hard to find and even harder to maintain. But resorting to acts such as physical violence destroys all hope to make things better, or to relieve the pain.
Say, you just saw a wonderful flower in the garden and fell in love with it. Would you nourish it, or will you plow it out of its roots?